It’s a key bowl, dad! Like to keep your keys in! I made it for you in pottery class! Morys, one of Zeus’ lesser-known sons, tried hard but everyone knew he wasn’t cut out for greatness. Hercules and Perseus steered clear, trying to avoid mediocrity by association, and Ares, who couldn’t stand his utterly mortal stench, was constantly hazing him. But he had heart, and Zeus appreciated that. As Lord of the Heavens and Tamer of Lightning, he obviously didn’t have any “keys” to put in it, but it was great for storing all the Golden Fleece and evil lion heads and whatnot his other sons brought him.

The advantage to having the world’s only set of invisible diamond jewelry, Clarice smiled to herself as she straightened a tiara only she could see, is that no one will ever think to steal them.

It's said that Cardinal Armand Perreault gorged himself on not one, but two ortolans as his last meal before he was executed for high crimes against the church. He smiled to himself, gluttony rounding out he last of his seven cardinal sins.

Folklore claims a tale composed with this typewriter will make its author illustriously famous as well as immeasurably wealthy—provided the scribe wholly avoids the letter “n.”

Ben still heard the drum, long after he had left the island. He heard it in his dreams, and in the strange trances into which he would fall, waking someplace different, covered in dirt and blood and with no idea where he had been.

Nobody believed him, of course, but when Andy Ammondin received a mineral collecting kit for his eighth birthday, he discovered he was able to speak to rocks. Lepidolite was quiet and slightly moody; cinnabar had an acerbic sense of humor; manganese always seemed like it was plotting something untoward. He was surprised to find that iron was actually quite tenderhearted and sensitive.

When the expedition plane bound for Mt Kilimanjaro instead crashed in the dense Tanzanian jungle, the lone survivor, Major Mitchell Risdall, wondered what use all of the mountaineering equipment would possibly be. Fortunately, it turns out snowshoes work just as well on quicksand.

An early pitch for a mid-1990s animated feature involved the antics of a wisecracking young scorpion and a gruff but kindhearted wolf spider working together as partners on the Archanopia police force to uncover a plot by rogue vinegaroons to kidnap Mayor Tarantula. It tested poorly, but was reworked into the script for Rush Hour with very few changes.

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Oyster forks and butter knives, the provenance of rich mens’ wives with highborn airs; their gilded lives the butler’s dignity deprives. An arson plot the maid contrives; With stolen fortune they might thrive. The manor burns; nothing survives Save oyster forks and butter knives.